We are just past the episode the world was waiting for where Brandi Glanville FINALLY graced our TV screens and dropped the bomb that we already knew about-- Denise and Brandi slept together. *Gasp.* Denise doesn’t know that the ladies are aware that this little rumor is going around and the women decide to wait until she’s already taken a plane overseas to Rome, Italy for their first girls trip of the season. Probably so Denise can’t run away-- this group isn’t manipulative or toxic at all!
The ladies have arrived in Rome and Teddi is relaying to Rinna and Kyle everything that Brandi said at Kyle’s house the other day. According to Brandi, Denise is apparently talking shit about every single one of them and then also the sex with Brandi thing that we've already known about. In the flashback of Brandi telling the women she slept with Denise, Teddi's face crumples in devastation that her and Kyle haven’t reached that level of friendship yet. HA! Just kidding.
Rinna: I have conflicted feelings about this. We all know how I feel about Brandi. *Flashback*
Brandi: YOU’VE HAD THE SAME HAIR-DO FOR 20 YEARS!
Rinna, who's had the same hair-do for 20 years:
Lol, classic. In another car, Dorit and Erika are talking about shopping and the weather.
They arrive at a gorgeous, sprawling italian hotel called Gran Meliá Roma which-- I just looked this up-- the cheapest room is $415 a night. Their rooms, however, cost just a cool $3K more than that :) lovely.
The ladies check in and are shown their 3.5K private suites that they’ll be staying in, and they all go their separate ways to freshen up and meet up later for dinner.
Kyle: What are you wearing to dinner? Dorit: I’m keeping it very casual.
Also Dorit:
She has literal pearls lining her hairline. But also, none of these ladies know what casual means so I can't say I'm surprised.
Denise and Garcelle haven’t arrived in Rome yet, I assume because they’re both actually working and had to show up late again. Sutton is also late but that’s just because she’s not a main housewife (and hopefully never will be), so we don’t even really need her there. Sorry not sorry.
They sit down for dinner and Dorit is shitting on Kyle for ordering a cocktail instead of wine or prosecco because they’re in Italy and then in the same breath proceeds to order a vodka soda. Lmaoo same, Dorit. (Except with tequila instead!)
LMAOOOO the waiter literally brought them mini cheese burgers. Love the subtle shade. Can you blame them? The idiot in office literally had McDonald’s catered so, I mean, it tracks.
They start to play a game called “what was the most trouble you got into as a teenager?” and honestly, I think my parents would probably agree that nobody could beat me in this game. At least we can laugh about it now, right guys?! (...I don’t think they’re laughing yet).
Just as Kyle is finished telling her cringey virginity story where she got caught (lol same, Kyle!), Garcelle and Denise show up to dinner and Teddi looks like she wants to die because she hates Denise.
Teddi:
They order more drinks as Garcelle asks the ladies if they think it would be okay for her to invite “chocolate Michael” (HER words NOT mine) to Thanksgiving, even though white, terrible Michael will be there. They say no and I agree. For the first time all season, the women manage to not be petty and don't bring up any of the Brandi stuff at dinner and they are able to end the evening in an uproar of laughs. Congrats guys! Pat yourselves on the back.
The next morning, the ladies all get ready to go shopping in the city of Rome. Erika looks like the Michelin Man except she made it fit and chic. She’s literally the only one who could rock something like that.
"Bitch this hat is Chanel"
Rinna tells a story about the twin churches in the Piazza del Popolo and how the people of Italy were very against the movie the Exorcist being filmed there. The day the movie premiered, one of the churches was struck by lightning. Following that, Denise discloses that she believes her house is built on an indian burial ground, and Erika talks about how she was a spanish boy in a past life who was kidnapped and lived in the bottom of a ship. After living near LA for three years now, literally none of this surprises me.
Unfortunately, Sutton arrives in Rome. I guess she was late because somehow she had to get her passport replaced to be able to fly commercial.
Literally nobody:
Sutton: Thank God I could get my passport cleared otherwise I would’ve had to charter a plane to get here!
This is why you’re nobody’s favorite Sutton.
The ladies go into a Fendi store and Garcelle tries on a cardigan that costs as much as a new car and almost all of them spend more than my monthly paycheck before sauntering off to Trevi fountain to throw pennies into it over their shoulder, take a group picture, and allow Dorit to have a solo photoshoot.
Back at the hotel, the women get ready for their dinner at the restaurant downstairs. Garcelle's outfit is...a choice-- but she still looks like a beautiful disco ball nonetheless and Lisa’s gorgina hair extensions are giving me life. I wish she would wear her hair like she did in this scene more often.
The women all make it down to the dining area and Garcelle, the shiniest one in the room, acts as if Dorit and Erika outfits are over the top. I also would just like to point out that nobody commented or said a word about Sutton's outfit and that tickled me.
Denise: I have an allergy to garlic...sorry.
The waiter taking her order (and also me): *dies*
OMG lmao Erika with the subtle shade when she says, “Finally some real italian food, not that shit they try to feed us back home.” and the camera pans to Buca Di Beppo’s interior designer of a single dining room, Dorit Kemsley. Loved it.
Sutton confronts Garcelle about the other night at dinner when Garcelle asked her where she got her money. Which like, I get it. But like, I also want to know too? So I’m not mad that Garcelle asked. Like the class act she is, Garcelle owns up to her boldness and apologizes then asking “so have we gotten all our issues out?” Of course now the dinner can only go to shit.
Here we go!!
Teddi confronts Denise about the things Brandi claimed Denise had said about her and the other women in the group. Denise seems perplexed by this accusation because she claims they aren’t that close and essentially calls Brandi Glanville a liar in her talking head. It’s weird to me that she’s acting as if she doesn’t even know who Brandi is which is clearly not true, and that kind of makes me want to believe Brandi? This is all v unclear.
The whole dinner starts unraveling and nasty accusations are being said about each of these women that Denise denies she ever said. Erika seems especially hurt by what was said about her probably because she's always having to defend her personality to people. I. GET. IT.
It finally gets down to whether or not they should tell Denise that they know a very personal detail of her sex life at a large dinner table, in the middle of a nice hotel restaurant. Despite the fact that literally ANYBODY with a brain or an empathy card would realize this is a horribly inappropriate time to bring this to Denise’s attention, these ladies know what makes good TV so they do it anyway-- and that’s why they have their own show, and we do not.
Rinna refuses to be the one to tell Denise that they know she slept with Brandi because she got in too much hot water for her munchausen comment back in 2015. The entire dance of beating around the bush in this scene is so uncomfortable to watch and I feel so bad for Denise in this moment. Teddi, who already has said it’s definitely not her place to tell her, goes ahead and blurts it out anyway. Such a class act.
HOWEVER, now that it's all out there, I really don’t know what to make of Denise’s reaction. It honestly feels like she got caught? It feels like one of those “Thy lady doth protest too much, me thinks!” moments. Her shock really didn’t seem sincere to me-- she seemed like she's panicking that the information got out not because the information isn't true. She tries to break the fourth wall saying, “bravo, bravo, bravo,” begs the women to stop talking about the subject on camera, and pleads to the crew to not air this on the show. She's freaking the fuck out. (Rightfully so!)
Teddi’s and Lisa’s talking heads are problematic. They’re both offended that Denise is upset that this is being aired and is accusing her of being fake and “caring about her image and reputation too much,” when really she's upset because bedroom details about her that she did not disclose herself are now public information. Why is that so outlandish for a celebrity who also has kids?
Kyle comes in very late to assure Denise that even if she did hook up with another woman, that they don’t care. Ok. Lol well, they have a very interesting way of showing that.
If nobody cared, this wouldn’t be a topic of discussion! Seriously, how TF are they gonna act like they care about Brandi Glanville’s feelings and reputation when every single one of them hated her in previous seasons?
I hate Sutton but I hate Teddi more, so I’m actually kind of glad that she called Teddi out asking her if she cares more about what Denise said about her or about who Denise slept with. Sutton reveals she's known for months and kept her mouth shut about it because she ACTUALLY doesn’t care.
Dorit tries to speak for Teddi and explain why the whole thing got brought up to begin with but naturally, Kyle interrupts her. Somehow the script is flipped and now it's a fight between Kyle and Dorit about who cares about Denise more?? So unclear how it got here? Just two seconds ago they were all jumping down Denise’s throat about what she did or didn’t say about them to Brandi and whether or not they slept together. Dorit calls Kyle rude, Teddi says closure won’t be happening this evening, and they all get very quiet and decide it’s probably time that this dinner comes to an end. I agree.
Aaand that’s it! Looks like next episode will be Pt. 2 of she said/she said/she said and I have a feeling we will never actually get to the bottom of what was really said. Do you think Brandi is telling the truth? Or is Denise really hearing all of this for the first time and adamantly denying it because it really isn’t true? Will Dorit use this trip as inspo for when she decorates a single dining room in a sad Buca di Beppo? Comment your thoughts below!
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